Life, love, and relationships are not about being even, and you cannot make someone do something for you even in the name of love.
Here are five steps to relinquishing the apology you’ll never get:įind a Therapist for Relationships Advanced Search
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So the work for you becomes more about how to relinquish the need for an apology, accountability, or remorse, which will enable you to move on and begin picking up the pieces of your life. It leaves you in a powerless place because you will never be able to will your ex into giving you what you so rightly deserve. When the need for an apology becomes connected to healing, the focus becomes your ex as opposed to yourself. Waiting for an apology you may never get will keep you stuck, unable to move on with your life. Both require courage and a deep capacity for empathy and compassion. Saying I’m sorry means admitting fault, as does acknowledging that the action has deeply hurt another person. The ability to repent for an act of betrayal requires a level of evolution that most people never aspire to reaching. If you’re waiting for an apology or some explicit expression of remorse from your ex, pull up a comfortable chair and get ready to sit for a while. I see it all the time in my work with divorcing people: the anger, bitterness, and frustration felt when one partner betrays or deceives the other with little or no remorse for their actions.
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